Every once in a while I meet these people who really don't seem to care what others think. I sometimes think they are pretending, but they can be really convincing. Then there are people who care, but they refuse to compromise what they believe in or what they want out of life by doing something just to make other people happy. I've always envied those people. I really want to be like that someday. I've lived a great portion of my life trying to make sure everyone liked me. You find out what everyone prefers, which is easy if you pay attention, because everyone wants to let you know what they like and don't like. Then you just learn to juggle everyone's needs and try to also take care of yourself. It's simple really, so long as you stay in bed and never leave your house! There are so many people who are scared to death of not being liked. It's a way of life for most teenagers. They do everything in an effort to fit in and make sure everyone likes them.
At 42 years old, I've realized that it's impossible to please everyone, and I've been living my life in constant obeisance to the complainers. I've decided I need to decide what glorifies God and is best for me based on my stage in life, and forget about the complainers. Although, that works so much better in theory than in practice.
Affirmation and approval are drugs that I love. I love them more than chocolate. On April 3, I started a 40 day social media fast. When I decided to do it, I knew that it would not be easy. I love my social media. I love to be funny and I love for people to like me. So when you like my posts, respond to posts, or share my posts, you are saying, "Tammie, I like you!' On April 3, I decided that for 40 days I would not interact or post on my accounts. I wouldn't look at my notifications and I wouldn't look at others posts as much as humanly possible. If you don't understand what that means, then you haven't decided to avoid all social media for 40 days. There are pictures and invitations that you will completely miss if you aren't checking religiously. These days, the only way you get invited to some events are through Facebook. People tag you in stuff and you get told by other people. You hear through the grapevine that something exploded on Facebook or Twitter and everyone is talking about it. I'm currently on day 25 and counting. So here are some things I've learned from no social media:
Affirmation and approval are drugs that I love. I love them more than chocolate. On April 3, I started a 40 day social media fast. When I decided to do it, I knew that it would not be easy. I love my social media. I love to be funny and I love for people to like me. So when you like my posts, respond to posts, or share my posts, you are saying, "Tammie, I like you!' On April 3, I decided that for 40 days I would not interact or post on my accounts. I wouldn't look at my notifications and I wouldn't look at others posts as much as humanly possible. If you don't understand what that means, then you haven't decided to avoid all social media for 40 days. There are pictures and invitations that you will completely miss if you aren't checking religiously. These days, the only way you get invited to some events are through Facebook. People tag you in stuff and you get told by other people. You hear through the grapevine that something exploded on Facebook or Twitter and everyone is talking about it. I'm currently on day 25 and counting. So here are some things I've learned from no social media:
- Affirmation and approval are my drugs of choice.
- The scariest thing in the world for me is to be alone with my thoughts.
- I'd rather give up chocolate for 40 days than social media.
- God is making me better despite all of my hangups.
The last one is the important one. God is making me better, because I'm allowing Him to work on me. I've spent a lot of time not letting God work. When God works, it hurts and stings; it's like going to the dentist. We dislike it so much that we avoid it! Sometimes we avoid it until He has a lot of work to do all at once and it seems like it would be easier to just stay the way we are. Bringing our will into submission with His is so difficult when we are trying to swim against the flow. I have so many days when I want to just be selfish Tammie and demand what I want, but I'm trying to die to myself daily. Philippians 1:6 says, "And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." So when we get to heaven, we can go around looking at all the finished works of art. "Oh, look at the Tammie. He finally finished her; I didn't think she would ever figure it all out. What a beautiful thing He made!"
